What’s wrong with this passage? (Be specific).?

It’s too overloaded: the words chosen for the description are too much and a lot of them are meaningless in the scene. It’s not necessary for the author to tell us it’s shocking, when she could just say what is happening instead. It needs to be more concise and make clear that Edward is sparkling, […]

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What do you live for?

I live not for an object or for someone else but I live for the fact that i was placed here for a reason. Wether you believe in a God or not someone out there, God, your parents, the stars, someone out there thought that this world would be a better place with you in […]

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